Loving You With My Whole Heart
by green mockingjay girl
Summary: AU. Lead me to the truth and I will follow you with my whole life.


**Summary:**AU. Lead me to the truth and I will follow you with my whole life.  
_**WARNING:**_There is Liason in the first chapter and there will be Lusam early on through this fic. But Jasam will be the ending result. And after the first few chapters there will be a lot of Jasam.  
**Authors' Note:**This story is very AU. I have made a lot of changes to GH's history. I will explain them as this story goes on but if you have any questions feel free to ask me.

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CHAPTER ONE

Nikolas shook his head disapprovingly as he came back into the dining room in Wyndemere to find Sam and Lucky making out. Not that he had a problem with Sam and Lucky's relationship. He was happy they had found happiness with each other. He just didn't want to have to watch his brother make out with his cousin. He coughed to let them they were no longer alone. "Can you guys break it up." He spoke as he sat across from them at the dining room table. They quickly broke away from each other and Sam's cheeks flushed bright red.

"Oh leave them alone Nik," Elizabeth said with humor in her voice as she sat down at the table next to Nikolas. She gave him a kiss before turning towards Lucky and Sam and said, "Alfred kicked me out of the kitchen. He said I was just getting in his way." Elizabeth wrinkled her nose as Nikolas wrapped one of her arms around her waist. "But he said dinner should be ready in the next ten to twenty minutes."

If someone had told Sam three years ago that she would willingly and civilly have dinner with Elizabeth Webber she would call them a bloody liar. The rivalry between them had ended at about the same time Jason decided to leave Port Chalres and not return. A week after he left Elizabeth came over to her apartment and asked for a truce. She had said it was ridiculous they were spending all their energy being spiteful to one another over a man that no longer was a part of either of their lives. Sam agreed and that ended all the bad blood between them. While her and Elizabeth would never be close friends she had grown to like the woman Nikolas loved so deeply. She was glad for Nikolas and Lucky's sakes they were done with ugly bar fights.

"Have you chosen a date for the wedding?" Lucky asked ran his hand up and down Sam's arm. She didn't even notice until then that Lucky's arms were around her.

Elizabeth took a sip of the wine glass in front of her before answering. "We would like to get married sometime next summer but we haven't decided on a date yet. We have both gotten married before so we don't need anything big We'd like to just have small wedding somewhere, maybe on a beach."

Sam gave her a funny look. "You are marrying a Cassadine and you expect to be able to have a small wedding," Elizabeth gave her a playful glare as Nikolas and Lucky bit their lips to try and hide their laughter.

"Well it will be the smallest wedding the Cassadines have had in a very long time." Nikolas said.

"Is there any chance you are going to make a honest woman out of Sam anytime so soon, Lucky?"

Elizabeth said it so lightly Sam thought she misheard her. After a moment Sam found the courage to speak up. "We haven't really talked about that."

Sensing the awkwardness Nikolas quickly spoke up and changed before Elizabeth could question them more. That was the last of wedding talk for the night.

* * *

Even after He the call from Carly where he leaned Michael had woken up he made no move to return to Port Charles. As much as he wanted to his reasons for leaving had not changed. His would still be putting the people he loved lives in danger. He only made the decision to return when he received another call from Carly. This time she was frantic. _"He doesn't remember any of us Jason. He's a wake but all his memories are gone. And I want to be there for him, be his mother but he won't let me. He keeps on pushing all of us away, except for Kristina. I know you said you would never come back but I need you now and so does he."_So now he was on a plane heading back to the town he promised he would never return to. He closed his eye the flight would still be four more hours before they would land. Sleep did not come to him but instead the night he decided to leave came to his mind.

_"I know what you are trying to do Jason but I won't let you." She waited for him to respond in any way but he didn't so she continued. "You are trying to push me away because you love me and because you are afraid me or Jake will get hurt like Michael was hurt." He still didn't say a word but he looked up at her. "I know you are hurting and I want to be there for you because we love each other. I know you blame yourself what happened to Michael but it's not your fault. Why can't you see that?"_

_"No. That is what you don't understand. Michael is suffering for the choices me and Sonny have made. AJ wanted to a father to Michael and I took his son from him."_

_"AJ was an alcoholic," Elizabeth said in disgust. "He never would have been a suitable parent to Michael."_

_"And a mob boss is? Because that's what Sonny is. You can sugar coat it all you want Elizabeth. But this is the line of work me and Sonny are a part of. There are a lot of things you can say about AJ. But if Michael was raised by him and the Quartermaines instead of me or Sonny he would not be in that hospital bed right now." Jason ran his fingers through his hair, "I am so tired of seeing the people I love getting hurt because of the decisions I had made. Because of the things I have done."_

_Tears were running down Elizabeth's cheek. "Baby what happened to Michael was not your fault. This is not on you ok?" She tried to bring him into a hug to comfort him but he just pushed her away from him. When Jason saw the look of hurt that went across her face he hated himself a little bit more._

_"So many people have died because of me. How can you be with me knowing that."_

_She didn't look up at him, "Your line of work doesn't change how I feel about you. You know that Jason." As he heard her words come out of her lips he could see she was struggling to believe them herself._

_"But that's not what I mean. So many people have had to pay the price for loving me. And now Michael is in a coma and he may never wake up. What if next time Jake is the one in that hospital bed? Will you be able to live with that knowing you let me in your life? Into your children's lives? Maybe you think you can but I know I can't."_

_"Jason." But then she stopped. She didn't know what to say._

_"Do you not understand what happens to the people in my life? They die Elizabeth. As long as I am here the people I love lives will be at risk. So I can't be here anymore. I have to leave."  
_

* * *

Hours later she cuddled on against him on the couch barely paying attention to the movie playing on the television screen in front of them. If you asked Sam what movie title was or what it was about she wouldn't be able to answer, because the only thing she was focusing on was how good it felt to be in his arms. Lucky was holding her hand gently and occasionally he brought her hand up to his lips and kiss it. She didn't think he truly understood how much little gestures like that meant to her. He made her feel so loved. Now it was funny to think how things started out between them. They had used each other to hurt Jason and Elizabeth but it had become so much more than that. She had wanted to make Jason suffer. Suffer for hurting her, for all the lies he told, but now when she was with Lucky Jason did not cross her mind. Sam couldn't imagine her life without him in it. She knew he felt he same way. He made sure she knew that every day. As the credits start to roll she dug her face into the crook of his neck. "You look tired," Lucky said softly as he ran his fingers through her raven colored hair. Sam didn't reply. She just smiled against his neck. After a moment she felt herself begin to drift off.

Lucky found himself smiling lightly as he looked at his sleeping girlfriend in his arms. He gently removed himself from her, careful not to wake her up. He put one hand behind her neck and the other underneath her legs and carried her up stair to their bed room. For a long time he had been so sure Liz was the one he was supposed to be with. He thought he would never be happy with anyone else. Now even if she wasn't engaged to his brother he wouldn't want to be with her. Sam was who he was with and he wouldn't change that. He would always value what he shared with Liz when they were things don't always work out and he had finally come to accept that. The credit went to Sam for that. She was the reason he hadn't completely fallen apart in that time. Despite his initial shock after finding out about his ex's relationship with Nikolas he had no negative feelings towards either of them. After laying Sam on the bed went to the bathroom to take a shower.

Ten minutes later he emerged from the bathroom, bare chested, in just pajama pants to find Sam still sleeping soundly. He slid into the bed and careful not to wake her, and wrapped his hands around her waist. With her in his arms he finally let the sleep take over.

* * *

He had spent much of his time away in Hawaii. And it had made him think of her. Maybe that part of why he stayed there as long as he did. On his trip he didn't make a habit or staying in one play longer than a few months but he stayed in Hawaii nearly a year. He had found there shack they had stayed in for their time there. Now a young couple was renting it out. They had been kind enough to let him come in for a moment and look around for a moment. He remembered how happy they were just like him and Sam had been when they stayed there. He had found a place near the ocean. It was small but he didn't mind he had never been high maintenance.

_She had been sending him stares for the last hour. Every time he looked towards her she quickly turned away. He forced himself to look away from her and bring back his attention to his cold beer. It was kind of strange after all the ignoring him she had been doing for the last few months now she couldn't seem to take her eyes off him. Sam suddenly got up from her seat where she sat with Robin on the other side of Jake's and sat in the bar still beside him. "When I dropped the boy's off at the house Elizabeth was really upset. She said you were leaving town for good. Is it true?" He didn't say anything. "Your silence gives me that answer. I know you think you are doing the right thing but I think you are making a huge mistake. I mean this is you Jason, you can't stand to see the people you love hurt and you think this is the only way you an protect them. So you leave them or pretend you don't care about them but nothing is going to change. They will still be in danger. Sonny is still in the business and I don't think that is going to change anytime soon. The only difference will be that you won't be here to protect them." When he didn't even bother to look up at her she sighed. Without saying another word she walked back to her table._

Jason was interrupted from his daze with the announcement on the intercom that everyone needed to put their seat belts back on and they would be arriving in Port Charles shorty. The only one who knew he was returning to town was Carly and Sonny. He was surprised Carly had actually told Sonny. They had been on bad terms ever since Michael got shot. That only worsened when Carly learned Sonny protected Kate instead of Michael in the warehouse that night. Every time he thought about that night it felt like a little stab in his heart. If he had been there for Michael the turn out may not have been as sever for Michael. But he couldn't think about that anymore. Now all he could do was do everything in his power to make sure that boy made it out ok.


End file.
